Monthly archives: July, 2014

We are coming home!

Our guide got the call and raced to the visa office grabbing Eli’s visa. He made it 3 minutes before they closed for their 3 hour break!

Thank-you so much for your sweet messages, donations, help with our hotel, and general pick-me-ups. Even before the good news, I felt surrounded by love as we woke up this morning.

It’s been a whirlwind canceling, rearranging, and negotiating but people-from friends to big business-have been so compassionate. I’ll never know the reason for our rather large speed bump but I have learned that I was wrong about my promise to leave my advocacy cape at home! It turns out it was needed afterall! While part of me has felt very frustrated with our US government, I have also gained a new and very personal appreciation for the hard work the people behind our federal government, their staff, and our Congress do for American citizens who need their help. We’ve also seen how much generosity exists in our community. We are so blessed. Please know your hard work, prayers, and effort to bring attention to our case has made all the difference.

Our guide told Eli he’s going home to America! I tried to catch the moment but Eli looked so somber….I then realized that our guide was scolding him for jumping on an elevator before us, slamming the door, and inciting a hotel-wide (18 floors!) search! He’s definitely kept us on our toes as we’ve worked through all of this. After we got all that behind us and Eli was delivered the GOOD news, he delivered his trademark hands in the air, “oh yeah oh yeah!!!!”

Checkout is arranged for 5:30am our time tomorrow (we are 12 hrs ahead of the US). If all goes well and stays on time, we’ll make it home around 5:30pm Friday! Can.not.wait!

Now to celebrate……with a nap! Keeping up with US time in China is exhausting!

We are snuggled into bed listening to Eli’s giggles as he watches Despicable Me 2. He got wish 1 of 3 (his watch) when we went shopping yesterday at Shamian Island. His wish to see his sister should now happen as we’d hoped onThursday evening-just 3 more sleeps! Oh and his other wish (for a gun!) will have to wait a bit!

We are so very thankful that the visa system seems to be back up and running. While I wish we could have spared the families who were delayed the incredible cost and hardship, it has been so nice to meet them. Eli has played with a new friend, Jay, several times since we arrived to this hotel. We’ve loved getting to know Jay, his family, and so many others. So thankful these children are on their ways home and I can’t wait to watch them all grow! This experience is a special one to share and I am thankful for new friends in the process.

And in speaking of shared experiences, our guides have been incredible. I don’t think I could have hand-picked two better people for us. Our first guide, Rosary, was so sweet and knowledgable. She helped us traverse those first days with Eli in the more difficult province for accessibility. I will never forget the way she helped us communicate those early expressions of love and Eli’s returned happiness to join our family. We met John in Guangzhou and he has kept us sane through the fear of being stuck. He’s fun and has taught us so much about the culture here and Eli. In yet another “what are the chances” twist, he actually met Eli a couple years ago! Eli had been brought to a summer event where American adoption agency officials come to meet hundreds of kids. If a child stands out, they are sometimes selected by an “advocate” who works hard to get that child adopted. To our knowledge Eli was never selected….until us obviously!

We’ve also shared this experience with Adam’s parents, Bob and Donna. I could not be more thankful for their help and support from the very beginning of this adventure. This trip has had such intense highs and such difficult lows. They’ve made us laugh through tears, helped traverse the tricky terrain, carried our not-so-light minion who somehow has all the energy in the world to run in the hotel but cannot walk 5 feet outside, and helped us show Eli the love that is family. They’ve been up for anything and we’ve done just that! I hope they feel even a fraction of how grateful we are for their love.

We are also so thankful to all the people at home who have made this dream-our dreams-a reality. From people who donated to help us reach our goal of fully funded to everyone who has shared words of encouragement or our story-we are so thankful. So many friends and family have cheered us on from the start. The disability community has been such a strong source of support. We just learned tonight that Eli will meet three new friends with achondroplasia at the airport. I remember my first time seeing other people who looked like me and I am so excited for all that is ahead for him. We can’t express our gratitude enough to our family who have cared for Hannah while we have been gone. Missing her has been the heaviest weight on our hearts but knowing she is having fun and well-cared for has made it possible to accomplish our mission here-getting Eli home! We are strong believers that “it takes a village” and there’s no way we would be days from bringing our son home without the support of ours and their shared belief that this was possible.

And finally-I am most thankful for my Adam. We’re generally not into giant public, online displays of affection but a piece on my gratitude wouldn’t be complete without him. I can’t imagine sharing this crazy journey with anyone else. Adam makes me feel like there’s nothing I can’t do and together-I think he’s right. Adoption-especially for us- can be scary. It’s not easy to let your heart be vulnerable enough to start loving a little one that you know little about and there’s such a winding path to your union. Adam has been a rock and there’s nothing I like more than watching him being a Dad (and now Baba).

For those hoping for an update post, I do have lots to share about Eli’s first trip to the zoo. We need to crash early tonight though because tomorrow morning Eli will be sworn in as an American citizen. I am so proud of our country and can’t wait for him to start to blossom in the opportunities he’ll now have for a bright future.

Until tomorrow!

Popping on for a short update as we wait for our flight (on Friday Day 7).

Yesterday was a free day. Our guide handled business for us that we didn’t need to be present for. Instead, we spent the day at the park. It’s so much fun getting to know Eli. He is a tiny politician-shaking hands with all we meet and still telling the we are his parents and now he adds,”I am their son.”

The world is now like a giant candy shop for Eli so we are also learning to reel him in and try to avoid overstimulating him. He can be a bit like the yellow minions! He wants each toy we see but is also so sweet. He pointed to a plastic bracelet and said, “Mei Mei Hannah.” We did pick up some bubbles at the park and his joy was incredible. He loves them!

We relaxed for the rest of the afternoon and then joined other adopting families for dinner. It’s been nice to see their little ones (all younger than Eli) opening up and bonding.

And finally we all slept well! Feeling rested and ready for Guangzhou!

See you there!

Today (Wednesday in China) we headed to Eli’s hometown to apply for his passport. It was a 3 hour drive there and over 4 hours back. I had been dreading this trip because I had heard that some people haven’t had air conditioning in their van, hadn’t been able to use the bathroom all day, and couldn’t eat all day. We have an amazingly awesome guide, van, and driver. I actually enjoyed the trip because it gave us a chance to cuddle with Eli. He’s a busy boy so it was especially good for me to get some closer, quieter, extended time.

Eli’s city has fewer tall buildings. Life is a little more slow..a few scooters instead of dozens. People were friendly and we were told the city is very safe. Eli’s orphanage directors came to fill out paperwork. We learned he’s been living in not only an orphanage but a welfare institute (where people of all ages live who need support from the government). One of his directors said hello but Eli didn’t seem to have any reaction. Our guide let us know that he probably didn’t have any contact with them. He got very excited to enter the city but wasn’t sad or confused. Our guide asked him about the day before when he cried before our nap. He adamantly denied crying so I guess it’s the first of a few hard times neither of us will fully understand.

Our trip took the vast majority of our day. We did stop at a Chinese hamburger joint….in one word-YIKES! Besides the random urination on steps or the sidewalk (which can put a quick end to your appetite), the food was pretty unrecognizable. A random girl without parents in sight sat at our table. She was adorable and super friendly but also mocked Ei’s height at some point in our conversation. On a more humorous note, she told our guide that Adam looked like Mr. Bean! After we ate, we stopped at a rest stop (per Eli’s request) and I was so shocked…they had an accessible bathroom-in the middle of the Chinese countryside! I was amazed!

The ride home was a tad terrifying. Lane lines are completely a suggestion. As is the direction of the road-even the highway! Imagine the worst traffic you have EVER seen…triple it and it’s every day here in cities. Our driver decided to take a detour….on dirt scooter roads. Since we lived to tell, it was pretty awesome. We eventually dead ended into a narrow pedestrian passage. So naturally, we just reversed back down the dirt road.

We were all exhausted after the day so bath and our increasing bedtime routines ended our night. Elil is a fan of routines so we’re hopeful some of these can transfer to our next hotel. We are officially finished with provincial business and just need to head to the next city for our national business. We need Eli’s passport first though. It should be ready by Friday morning and we fly out at noon.

All for now!

*Disclaimer: Please ignore typos! I have to peck these out on my phone.

Dear Eli

As you snooze peacefully next to me (hands perfectly folded on your chest!), I want to tell you about the day we met you-the day we became a forever family…

I now know that we’d both been preparing and dreaming for that day. You’d flipped through our picture album until some pages were so worn they might come out. Your nanny said you immediately looked at our family picture and knew-WE were your family. Someday you’ll know that people like us have to make all kinds of decisions about when and how to share about our disabilities. We have never struggled over that decision more than when we sent our introduction to you. We worried your questions wouldn’t be answered or you, like so so many adults, would he uncertain. We decided we wanted you to know everything you could about us and that if we wanted you to be proud, we had to keep practicing being proud (by the way, I’ll tell you all about a woman who put that quote in my heart someday). My heart was pounding when I mailed you our book. I sometimes laid awake at night wondering what you would think of us. How would we let you know we would keep you safe and that we have so much fun? I practiced how I would talk through your interpreter. Fear would sometimes seep in as some would ask, “but has has he seen your pictures? Does he KNOW?” Yes…you knew and from the very first moment, you knew that we could, would, and DO love you!

You walked confidently through the doors of the government affairs office this morning right up to your Baba and me all smiles! You were wearing the Ninja Turtles shirt we sent you over The Chinese New Year! After we shook hands, you giggled when we liked your hair-a mohawk! You immediately joined in play with us and the other kids at our Gotcha Day. We can see you are social, happy, and on-the-go! Despite our terrible Mandarin, you listen well (so far-heehee). When we said it was time to go, you wanted to wear your new backpack and go! You a did say goodbye to your nanny first though. She hugged you tight and when you turned to play with Baba, she began to cry. She loved you so much. I promised her we would keep you safe and take good care of you.

On the ride back to the hotel, you showed us how well you can play games on the phone. Our guide asked if you’d like a nap since you’d woken before 6 to drive from the country to meet us. You said you’d rather go to the park! It’s (literally) 105 so the park came to our room and hotel halls with balls and balloons. Your guide chatted with you about your new name and you’ve already begun to respond to it!

You are such a curious and smart boy! In our room, you found your headphones first and gestured you wanted to put them in. You did and we showed you Hannah’s music on the iPad. You chose Frozen and started belting out “Let it Go” in Mandarin! We couldn’t believe it and I can see you, like your sister and BaBa love to make people laugh.

We Video Called a few family members who were awake at home and you lived waving and telling them hello. You even told your Lao Lao Birdied congratulations after she’d told us. We walked to lunch with your NiNi and YeaYea and you share some of YeaYea’s soup AFTER you are an entire plate of dumplings! We learned we should order what you do. You picked it out from the menu yourself! You looked around taking in your first restaurant meal. You’d occasionally rattle off sentences to passing waitresses and they’d laugh-we are clueless but cracking up!

In our room, you’ve explored every nook and cranny. I’ve never seen someone more excited about new shorts and shoes. You’ve shown off your shoes in the hall and just twist your ankle in the air as you beam. We make out “thank you” in Mandarin when we’ve given you something you love. You are so sweet and what a helper! You want to hold every door and hold the elevator for Mama each time.

We did eventually take a quick nap and you were ready for more play. You love music and technology. We’ve been communicating pretty well so far. I feel a little like I’m talking to ET. EVERYTHING is new and you want to know what it is and how it works….,,the scale, flossers, balloons, and all sorts of cords. Whatever you get out, you put back neatly! You even gave me a look and hung my towel that was on the floor! You’ve got your hands full with Hannah. You asked about MeiMei within seconds of meeting us and you two finally “met” on FaceTime when she woke up. She studied you and you waved saying “Hi MeiMei!!” (again) smiling. I cannot wait for us to be together!

You took your first bath and seemed to love getting clean! Wow-those ears! I don’t know how you even heard us through that wax! We used our phone translator to explain it was time for bed and you climbed in. It was clear you’d rather play but you are such a good listener.

What a day! I will never forget this feeling Eli. We’d prepared ourselves for what we thought was anything but I don’t think I allowed myself to think it could be this amazing. I was prepared that you might attach to one of us more than the other at first but you’ve come to us both and been so loving. It feels like a dream. We are already so proud of you and love you so much. We know today wasn’t easy for you as you left everything and everyone you’ve known. You are so brave and I’ve never felt a love so courageous. Your sweet voice whispered “wo ai ni (I love you) Mama. Wo ai ni Baba” before you went to sleep. When we go home, you’ll hear people tell us how lucky you are to be adopted. Please remember we are the lucky ones!

Love you to China and back,
Mama