Tag: adoption

May 08 2014 2Commentsby writekara@gmail.com

Happy Birthday Eli!

Posted in Adoption

Elibirthday1Last week-on the other side of the world-our son turned 7!

I woke up that morning with a collision of excitement, uncertainty, and a little sadness that we’re not yet together.

We’d arranged to send a cake to Eli’s orphanage. With cakes, care packages and well-almost everything with adoption!-there’s uncertainty. You’re never certain it reached it’s destination-Eli! Sometimes you receive word that the package or cake was delivered. Sometimes you don’t. Sometimes you receive pictures. Often, you don’t.

I reminded myself that an update for us would be nice but what mattered the most was Eli’s big day. I just hoped tha
t he felt LOVED and special.

Last night, I received an update from the woman who arranged to send the cake to Eli’s orphanage. She said she’d send the pictures “tonight”. I’m never clear if people mean China-time, Ohio-time, or Utah-time (where our agency is). So naturally-I checked my e-mail incessantly last night. When Obie needed his typical 4 am stroll, I saw our pictures had arrived! I wanted to open them with Adam and Hannah so I waited until we were all awake.

After 2 computers, 3 browsers, and several phone apps, nothing worked to open the files! The file format was written in Chinese and it seemed nothing would open it. After a series of roundabout attempts, I signed up for what appears to be a Chinese version of something G-mail-like. It has a Google Drive-like service that had the same file type as my attachment. It worked! These pictures are some of the most amazing gifts I’ve ever received!

Look at his sweet face!

He looks happy and I was overcome with appreciation. Thankfulness that he’s come into our world. Thankful we are getting so much closer to bringing him home. Thankful to the many, many people who have made our journey possible thus far and incredible thankfulness to the kindness of the nannies who have cared for him and will continue to do so until we can get him home. Adoption is such a tricky collision of emotions. I’m all at once overwhelmingly sad that this is in all likelihood the first time his birthday has been recognized and at the same time-so excited (and eager!) for what’s to come. I notice all of the little changes since the last time we saw pictures (in November!). His teeth have grown in! His little mohawk is new!

As I look at the little faces surrounding Eli, I can’t help but to wonder about their futures. Is someone coming for them? Eli has grown up around these children-these nannies. He will miss them so deeply. For this reason, too, these pictures are such an invaluable gift. Someday I’ll link our memories-his of a special day with a tasty cake and mine of wishing and wanting a little boy to know much he is already very much loved.

Happy Birthday Eli!


 Elicuttingcake Elibirthday8
Birthdaycake

Birthdaysmiles


Apr 05 2014 0Commentby writekara@gmail.com

T-Shirt Referral Contest: Let the Games Begin!

Posted in T-shirts, BeTheGood

tshirt referral contest graphic

 

Our Booster t-shirt campaign has sold more than 30 shirts! We have just 10 days left until the campaign closes and we would love to blow our goal of 50 out of the water. The most exciting part of selling more shirts is that as the numbers rise, Booster charges less to print per shirt. That means that more money from each shirt will go towards Eli’s adoption fund. In sharing this with a friend-who wishes to remain anonymous-she suggested a contest to bring our campaign home with a strong finish. She donated a 25$ gift card for the winner and we couldn’t wait to kick it off.

Here’s how it will work:

1. Share our Booster page with your friends and networks asking them to join our campaign by purchasing a shirt.

2. Ask them to say YOU sent them in the comment section of the Booster page. If they forget (or would rather not write a comment), no worries! They or you can contact me after their purchase via email (writekara at gmail dot com) or our FB page.

3. Keep sharing until 4/14 when our campaign and the contest ends.

4. I’ll tally the sales and the person who referred the most will be mailed their Amazon card on 4/15/14.

One final note-I see a few people who were already referred! These count as well. If you referred someone and they didn’t mention it in their comment, just let me know and I’ll get yours counted.

We hope this is a fun way to help share and promote our campaign. We know your friends, your networks, and your contacts are important to you and we truly appreciate your willingness to help us share our story and our goal-to roll Eli home!


Feb 24 2014 0Commentby writekara@gmail.com

LID and Fundraising Update

Posted in Fundraiser

LIDWe reached another milestone this week! Just in time for Adam’s birthday, we received word that we are officially LID, which means our dossier paperwork is Logged In to China’s system. Our Logged In Date (LID) is 2-18. Now for the next big wait. Our ultimate goal with this part of the process is the Letter of Approval (LOA). Along the way, we’ll hopefully hear when we are Out of Translation (OOT) and have been reviewed. The total LOA wait can range from around 40-100 days. As Eli’s 7th birthday nears, we are especially hoping for a fast one.

Since we’ve completed the majority of our official adoption paperwork, we’re now focusing on grant applications. We applied for a grant from Help to Adopt in the fall but were notified that we were not among the recipients. We have a growing list of grants to consider now thanks to the help of other adoptive parents and their suggestions. I’m working on knocking those out. The requirements for the grants differ widely. All require the same basic demographic information but many also request detailed financial, residential, employment, and spiritual histories. Gathering our information gave me a good opportunity to run the numbers and provide a fundraising update to Team Eli:)

Here’s what we’ve done so far:

Joe’s Social Media Matching Grant Campaign: An amazing family friend, Joe Hall, offered a generous matching grant in conjunction within inviting his friends in the social media world to contribute to our tax-deductible Adopt Together account. By the end of the year, Joe’s campaign raised $5634.

Puzzle Piece Fundraiser: We kicked off our adoption announcement with the start of puzzle piece fundraiser. Since then, 345 pieces have been claimed! Some of these donations came directly through our PayPal donation link ($1865). Others were part of Joe’s matching grant campaign. I plan to continue writing the names of people and organizations who donate-even if it’s part of a different fundraiser-because I love the idea that Eli will someday know how many, many people helped bring him home. As of tonight, we have 155 more pieces available.

Bravelets: We introduced our Bravelets campaign when we were officially DTC. They are a bit pricey but there was no cost to sign up, no time limit associated with sales, and the process was pretty easy. So I created a profile and chose some colors to represent our campaign. We haven’t sold any at this time but there’s no harm in keeping our campaign open.

TOTAL RAISED SO FAR (as of 2/23/14): $7499

Sales of Personal Items: While not a fundraiser, we thought it was an important enough part of the process to share that we-like many families pursuing adoption-have also sold some personal items to raise money for fees. In addition to contributing savings, we’ve raised around $5000 from these sales.

We’ve also been running the numbers on what fees and travel expenses are ahead. We’ve made some incredible progress and still have a ways to go. We’re not a family that minds hard work and remain committed that adoption isn’t only an option for wealthy families. Finances are something we typically keep much more private but I’m also choosing to share in hopes that this transparency will give prospective adoptive parents-including those with disabilities-an idea of what to expect. I’ve learned so much about this process from the blogs of other adoptive parents that I also aim to pay that gift of knowledge and experience forward. If you don’t have upwards of $25,000 set aside for adoption, it’s still possible. If you believe it’s not though, you are probably right. Our experience has been a test of faith, creativity, and a reminder of the need to BELIEVE. The best is yet to come!

 

 

 

 

 


Feb 15 2014 2Commentsby writekara@gmail.com

We are DTC!

Posted in Adoption

Valentine heart reads DTC 02-14-14

 

Just in time for Valentine’s Day, we received some fantastic news! Our dossier (the GIANT package of documents) is officially officially DTC or Dossier To China. This means the documents were processed through all channels of authentication on the US side and are now on their way to China. This is a huge step in the adoption process and we hope the rest of the several steps to go move quickly.

What’s next?

Our next acronym target in the language of adoption is to be LID (Logged In Date). This means that our dossier has been received by the authorities and logged into their systems. We would love to see this happen in the next 10 days or so.

How’s Eli?

 

 

We wish we knew the answer to this question each and every day.

While we can’t request any new updates right now, we have been doing our best to get to know Eli in other ways. For Valentine’s Day, our family celebrated by eating a Chinese buffet. The food choices were labeled so it was a good way to try new things and try to remember what we liked. One of Eli’s profiles said that steamed buns are among his many favorite foods! We all had a chance to try those and other foods on Eli’s favorites. The steamed buns were not quite as adorable as the pig ones pictured here but they were still tasty. Even Hannah gave them a whirl!

steamed buns decorated to look like pigs are pictured

Another piece of important mail also made its way to China-and even Eli’s province-today. We’d nearly given up hope on the care package we sent at the very start of the year. It typically takes a little under two weeks for packages like this to reach our courier. We’re guessing that the mail was delayed or slowed even prior to the Chinese New Year holiday. After over 4 weeks, our package showed up an

d the kind woman who serves as a go-between added the items we requested (a bag with a note that includes Eli’s picture and a note labeling it as his personal property and a USB drive for pictures the orphanage may have taken of him over the years). We also sent a Bengals fleece shirt, a ninja turtle t-shirt and toy, a slinky, a tiny Iron Man toy, Eli’s dinosaur from my Aunt Kate and Uncle Glen, tea for the nannies, and suckers for other children in Eli’s room or foster home. Our note was signed from friends in the United States. We’re working on our official introduction to Eli, which will include a book of pictures, when we receive Letter of Approval (LOA).

contents of care package

 

We hope the package makes it to Eli but we know it’s never guaranteed. Some orphanages keep the packages-including picture books that introduce families-until the day the child is adopted. Others take pictures and videos as the child opens them! Hopefully, Eli will get our package sometime in the next few days and he, his friends, and nannies will like it.

Thank-you all so much for your support and encouragement on our journey. I hope we have more good news to share soon.

Kara


Jan 03 2014 0Commentby writekara@gmail.com
finding ad page

Building a History

Posted in Adoption

It’s amazing to me that Eli lives almost exactly on the other side of the world. Yet, our weather is shockingly similar. Right now, it feels like just 1 degree here in Cincinnati. In Eli’s province, it’s also freezing-just a tad colder (at -1). I’m starting to understand the sentiment “living in two time zones” as I frequently find myself checking the weather where Eli lives and thinking about what he might be doing. Does he have warm clothes? Is he giggling with friends? Sleeping well? Eating something he loves (which we’re told is nearly everything)?

At this point, we are somewhat used to not knowing…there are so many things we will never know. Harder yet, there are pieces of Eli’s history that he will never know. What would it be like to know nothing of where you truly came from? What would it be like to know even your birthday was very unlikely your actual date of birth? We feel it’s our obligation to track down everything we can so that someday-we can give Eli each and every bit of knowledge we know about his past. Many other adopting families share this desire and one of them pointed me in the direction of a man who locates the finding ads of abandoned children.

What are finding ads?

Since around 1999, China has been placing pages of finding ads for children who have been abandoned. It is illegal to place a child for adoption in finding ad pageChina so families often desperately enact plans to leave their children in a very public place-in hopes they will be found as quickly as possible. Some children are left with notes, money, or even family momentos. Due to the threat of legal action, there are typically no ties to the birth parents. The finding ads are intended to give family members one final chance to come forward and reunite with the child. After the ads have run, the child is issued a certificate of abandonment and can then be adopted. This single piece of paper seals their status as an orphan while opening their future to the possibility of adoption.

Was an ad placed for Eli?

Just a few hours after submitting my request, I received a response from the man who locates these newspaper ads. Eli’s ad has been found! It will include what we believe will be the earliest picture to date (and likely that we will ever have) of him. Even in our 6 inches of snow, we’ll definitely be checking the mailbox diligently because we can’t wait to see his sweet face. Most importantly, I’m excited to have this bit of Eli’s past to share with him. In scanning his files for the necessary information, I also located the public place in which Eli was found on a google map. We’re not permitted to share his province or finding location. The spot is just about an hour from his orphanage though so I’m hopeful we’ll be able to visit (or may even have to for paperwork) when we travel.

It’s hard to admire a bustling, urban area from the pixelated screens of Google Maps. Still, it’s so easy to see that Eli’s homeland is beautiful. Even in populated areas, there are rounded green areas with twisting sidewalks and smooth lines of waterways. There are tall buildings and long rows of smaller houses. I plan to take as many pictures as I can but I have a feeling even Eli will appreciate my aerial Google view of his homeland someday…at least I hope so.


Dec 30 2013 0Commentby writekara@gmail.com
picture of small child smiling and giving peace sign

Updates on Eli

Posted in Adoption

Our family just wrapped up an epic Christmas-celebrated no less than SEVEN times with family members and friends near and far. We are thankful, happy, full, and a little exhausted! While we had an amazing holiday, Eli was never far from our minds. I cannot wait to have even more turtles, ponies, or whatever he loves circling our tree and our fireplace really needs that fourth stocking. Even Hannah thought of Eli often this month. Her most memorable time being a false identification after swim lessons. She thought another child might be Eli and was suddenly extremely excited! In trying to head off what could be a pretty embarrassing/confusing situation, I tried to tell her quickly that A) That wasn’t Eli and B) We should not go embrace the child without asking! Hannah somewhat got the message and said, “Oh-are we not allowed to take kids?” She keeps us laughing…and alert!

A little before Christmas, an amazing surprise popped up in my inbox-an update on Eli. The adoption world is tricky. There’s a process for EVERYTHING. You are only allowed to request updates every few months. Each update also typically comes at a cost. We’ve been working hard to save and fundraise so while I’d love to request an update every day, we try to have some restraint! Updates also come with measurements, which can be helpful for planning everything from clothing sizes to car seats. After some serious practice in self-control, we finally submitted our request for an update around Thanksgiving. We were so disappointed to have our e-mails returned as undeliverable. I turned to our agency. They once again saved the day and I had an update by the next morning!

Our first realization was this: He’s grown so much!  From the pictures and reports, it looks as though Eli is no longer in foster care and is back in the orphanage. This sometimes happens when a child is matched with a family. It could also be just part of a transition period or some children come and go from the orphanage to foster homes pretty frequently. It’s tough not knowing…..What I do know is that Eli has lost his front teeth! His nannies report that he is active, smart, and helpful. He is protective of younger children and loves the playground. His giggles are apparently contagious and I can’t wait to hear them echo our halls.

I’m eager to share several other updates in the coming days but I’ll start with the very best-new pictures of Eli:) picture of small child smiling and giving peace sign EliUpdate2